Death Blade (1984)
Directed by:
Brian “Brainchild” Galbraith
Writing credits:
Brian “Brainchild” Galbraith
Galafrath Zartong
Princess Snoogro
Genre:
Horror / Romance / Comedy (more)
Tagline:
Blades are sharp… Deathblade is even more sharper!
Plot Outline:
When 14 year old Jody Himbrinkster finds an old abandoned doll factory under her grandmother’s house, she decides to camp out there one night. Little did she know that Death Blade also wanted to camp there, and Death Blade creeps … (more) (view trailer)
User Comments:
“The character of Death Blade is totally implausible for two reasons. 1) An inanimate piece of metal cannot run for President in the state of Kentucky. B) I don’t know about you but I have NEVER seen a knife of any kind show any kind of emotion, let alone sorrow, and especially towards an anteater, as in scene 12a”… (more)
User Rating:
3.2/12 (22 votes)
Credited cast:
Ricardo Hosanga
Wolfsbane Silverthrall (A.K.A. Martin Skentor)
Randolf Parveen
Parveen Patel
Jody Himbrinkster
Meryl Streep
Wheelchair-bound deaf/mute Priest #11
Chuck Norris
Grundle
Randy Quaid
Bob Rintles
Quincy Jones
Sherriff Poosnacks
Chevy Chase
Psychotic Dollmaker
Maggie Mandrill
Bobby “Ace” Bobbinson
Rupert Tangleflarg
“Scotty”
Dan Pilchardfax
Egyptian Mummy
Randall Bennings III
(more)
Also Known As:
Pteui! Je Suis le Cut!! (FRA)
Runtime:
USA: 122 min
UK (VHS): 7.3 min
Country:
USA / Bangladesh
Language:
English / Dutch / Deathbladenese
Memorable Quotes:
Bob Rintles: It’s some kind of blade… only more death like?
Sherrif Poosnacks: Yes.
Bob Rintles (sighing): Like… like a death blade?
Bobby “Ace” Bobbinson: The real question is: where is Jody now?
Grundle: Yes. That is indeed the question.
Bobby “Ace” Bobbinson: Yes. The question.
Grundle (headbutting a spoon pretty hard): Somebody must to change my diaper now.
Scotty: Oh, give it a rest you big baby!!!
(entire cast laughs for 18 seconds. Wheelchair-bound deaf/mute Priest #11 is pushed across the screen by Egyptian Mummy. Brief close-up of his drooling face accompanied by a farting noise. )
Goofs:
• Factual errors: In the scene where a donkey is crowned president of the universe, a close up of a rodent eating a pizza shows the rodent wearing a Casio Calculator wrist watch. Everyone knows rodents don’t eat pizza.
• Continuity error: When Sherrif Poosnacks arrests Bobby “Ace” Bobbinson for exposing his genitals to the animals in the zoo, he is carrying a bazooka on his shoulder. In the next scene, the bazooka is actually a dead horse.
• Revealing mistakes: In several shots, the limits of the production’s stretched budget can be seen: 1) The grandmother’s house is seen to be miniature in Scene 3B when the directors foot accidentally crushes the entire kitchen (and the grandmother). 2) The horse that Ricardo Hosanga rides into the sunset at the end is clearly the Number 27 bus to Bishop’s Stortford covered in brown paint. 3)
• Miscellaneous: Brian “Brainchild” Galbraith smelt of cabbage so strongly that dogs went cross-eyed in his presence.
• Factual errors: Cheese cannot be combined with a supercomputer to create gunpowder OR deathblades.
• Continuity: In the final battle scene, Death Blade can be seen scratching out a message to its final victim on the walls of its ice prison. However, in between a series of jump cuts, Death Blade is seen to be the following: a cat sellotaped to the side of a building, a pumpkin carved in the shape of an orthodontist, a mandrill stapled to a baboon, Bob Geldoff’s left testicle, and a plate of raw chicken liver.
• Revealing mistakes: Jody Himbrinkser can be heard shouting “TURN OFF THE FUCKING CAMERAS, MY FACE IS FALLING OFF” in the infamous face-melting scene.
• Incorrectly regarded as goofs: Meryl Streep playing the part of a 14 year old girl: this was intentional on the part of the film-makers, who contend that, “in the crazy world of the death blades, even old ladies look like kids, probably.”
• Crew or equipment visible: The piece of string that the stunt crew used to pull Death Blade along the floor is not only visible, it is decorated with alternating pink and yellow stripes.
Insider Trivia:
• The dog in the seance scene was actually responsible for coming up with a large proportion of the movie’s marketing campaign.
• Actor’s Trademark: Wolfsbane Silverthrall (A.K.A. Martin Skentor) adding “And that’s the magic of Christmas!” whilst looking at the camera and licking his lips after delivering each and every line of dialogue.
• Director Trademark: Cutting to close-ups of barbecued rat meat every 3 to 4 minutes.
• Director Brian “Brainchild” Galbraith underwent an unsuccessful sex change operation during filming. His director’s chair, with Brian crossed out, “Brenda” written on top, then crossed out again and “Brian” written over that in magic marker, sold for $14 on ebay.
• Director Trademark: A cat wearing sunglasses drives a Cadillac in the penultimate scene.
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